What’s Up at The Zone
Upcoming Excitement, Events & Special Hours
We know that you have been experiencing high degrees of irritability, some serious discontent, and even periods of genuine lonely isolation from being deprived of the real news and updates from The ZONE. Well, your problems are solved. Not all of your problems of course; in fact compared to the rest of the problems you may have, solving these few could seem rather insignificant. Nevertheless, below you will find an ever-changing selection of tasty morsels to keep you informed of the events, both real and imagined, occurring at ULTRAZONE Laser Tag San Diego.
ONE HOUR ENDURANCE- Thursday, August 4th 10:00pm
1 Hour of continuous play for only $20.00 each game—so cheap!!
Now you remember the deal- 1- CASH ONLY and 2- Early sign up & prepayment is strongly advised because ENDURANCE GAME SELL OUT and 3- NO REFUNDS- uh sorry (actually not really)
ULTRAZONE Is Chosen As A Pokestop for Pokemon Go!
How wild is this? The front of ULTRAZONE, “Ruin Wall Art,” was selected by the Pokemon uh people or creatures as one of the Pokestops for Pokemon Go. Now the Pokemon minion must have visited last year because we have new art work now courtesy of Alan The Scenic Painter. Anyway we are “Ruin Wall Art”- another amazingly awesome moment for us.
Cage The Elephant Visits ULTRAZONE
So I guess you could say the “ULTRAZONE Was The Opening Act” for Cage The Elephant’s recent visit to San Diego. The guys came down to visit and play lasertag with the winners of a Rock 105 promotion. Needless to say they loved us!
New Discoveries In THE ZONE: The Return of Mystical Alan, the Scenic Painter
New elements appear in The Underground City of the Far Future are now part of your laser tag experience
THURSDAY NIGHT “COLLEGE NIGHT”–3rd GAME FREE is on summer break and will return September 7th
Another ZONE tradition will return for fall. Hey college people; buy 2 games at regular price and get the 3rd game free! Just our way of helping the “starving student.”
College Sororities and Fraternities- “MAKE US A DEAL WE CAN’T REFUSE!”
College Greeks have been using ULTRAZONE as a venue for “Rush Events,” “Bid Nights,” “Date Nights” etc. You want to have a great chapter night out, but money is always tight so go ahead and MAKE US AN OFFER WE CAN’T REFUSE! We know this sounds crazy but we’re encouraging you to just tell us what you think is reasonable in your House budget and we can go from there. Remember we’ve hosted events with over 100 players so we’ll be able to accommodate your entire group.
LATE NIGHT AT THE ZONE”- Friday and Saturday From Midnight to 2:00am
A San Diego mainstay for the late night crowd, with a reduced price of $7.50 per game. Players start lining up around 11:30-11:45 to be part of the Late Night scene. See you this weekend!
Carpe PM, Seize the Night: Corporate Groups “Own the ZONE”
The business community continues to turn to the nocturnal world of ULTRAZONE for their major event needs. Our San Diego corporate event and team building program has really reached new levels of popularity. We continue to be flattered by the letters of appreciation and complimentary comments that come our way.
ULTRAZONE Is A “Gum Free” ZONE
After removing more gum from the lobby and briefing room carpet than you could even possibly imagine (we’re talking many hundreds of ugly carpet gum messes each year), we’ve decided that WE’RE DONE WITH GUM. That’s right you and your gum will have to part company BEFORE you enter ULTRAZONE. There’s a really nice, large cement trash receptacle near the front door, so just gear yourself up to spit that bad boy into the can.
Of course we’re never really been able to understand why anyone would spit their gum onto the carpet anyway, but we do have a few theories
The “Chewing Gum Challenged” Theory.
In their early development, these poor folk never learned to keep items in their mouth while chewing, certainly a true tragedy. Consequently, gum and other foodstuffs just fly out of their mouths depositing on other people or objects or ultimately the floor. It is unknown whether this malady is a problem with poor childrearing or a genetic anomaly.
The “Hostile Gum Chewer-It Sucks To Be You” Theory.
Now these are the more aggressive and angry gum chewers. They get great pleasure thinking about the ULTRAZONE staff that clean up their gum. They find the best location they can, and then they spit their gum onto the designated carpet target area and then immediately press the gum into the carpet with their foot. Obviously from abusive gum chewing households, they continue the abusive pattern into public places.
The “Duh, What Happened to My Gum” Theory.
Perhaps the most heart rendering theory, these unfortunate chewers have no memory of what happened to their gum- sort of a brain-mouth disconnect if you will. They are shocked to find that they are no longer chewing the gum that was, at a prior moment, in their mouths. They simply no longer have a lucid connection to the gum chewing moment. This is a form of amnesia caused by a trauma to the head or by just being a moron
The “Heathen/Raised by Wolves” Theory-
A product of a culture very foreign from one we typically see in normal society, this gum chewer can be recognized by a pattern of abnormal gum chewing. These sub-humans chew with mouths open and are known to “crack” their gum and then just spit it randomly onto the ground. The gum “cracking” is only recently recognized as a sub-vocal warning of territorial rights, much as the male gorilla beats his chest to signify dominance. Oblivious to others outside of their basic tool making society, attempts to get them to disengage from such practice are rarely successful and often met with aggressive posturing.
Bottom line is that gum chewing is pretty much a sickening and nasty habit!
So remember gum and ULTRAZONE don’t mix!